Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Piropos aka Outfit #8

hello


All remixed except ring
Dress: Banana Republic
Belt: Target
Booties: Aldo
Earrings: Turkey
Ring: Swap with Kimmie via Ashley Getting Dressed

So I left the house feeling really good about my outfit. It's simple, and I love the booties with this dress. (Remember when I was afraid of wearing booties? Yeah, I'm getting over that fear.) I felt great in this outfit and I actually spent time on my hair, combing it out and doing a little fishtail braid.


And then I was leaving the office after volunteering this morning, and this guy was coming in. He was older and he looked pretty respectable, but then I walked past him and he was all like, "Hello, cutie."


"Hello, cutie"? I was already past him, but I totally turned to give him my best stink eye teacher look (believe, I've got a good one.) Because, really? Now, in the spirit of full disclosure, I live in the hood where these types of comments are not that unusual. Also, I volunteer in a neighborhood that's predominantly Latino, and yes, "piropos" are part of the culture.


But here's the thing, no matter what the above link says, piropos are not always fun. In fact, they're rarely even clever. They remind me too much of when I was in middle school gym class and the boys would sit down to watch us run by and make comments about our recently developed butts and hips and breasts and then try to grab us in the hallways. This at a nice school in suburban Illinois, no less.


This is not the first time that something like this happens when I'm walking to and from work, and I'm certain it won't be the last, but it just annoyed me SO. MUCH. And it got me wondering what it is about my body and my face that makes men think I'm freakin' public domain. What gives these people the right to comment on my looks or my body or the way I walk? Would you do that to your mother, daughter, sister, friend?


I was telling B. the other day how often I avoid going out or going to certain places just because I am not in the mood to deal with such foolishness. And it makes me so mad. So, so mad because am I letting them win by staying in? Or am I claiming my own space and preserving my peace of mind? I can't decide. The only thing I do know is that I could go out in pajamas, in a tee and jeans, in a dress and heels, in yoga pants a tee and sneakers and the results are the same. Some days I can give the stink eye or say something like, "AquĆ­ no se le perdiĆ³ nada" (You didn't lose anything here so stop looking at me) or just ignore it. Other days, I just can't deal.


On a lighter note, treats always make Kiku dance.


Check out the other remixers.

10 comments:

  1. The simplicity of your outfit is what makes it stand out and the booties match very well.

    I dislike getting those comments too, but I have to learn to deal with them. Most of the people who say those things are harmless, though most of them are gray-haired old men...that don't look sleazy. So maybe they appreciate you and wanted to compliment!

    When I'm feeling down, sometimes, these unintended comments make my day since they're so unexpected.

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  2. AY! I totally understand you and yes, unfortunatellt it's the latino's, whenever I go to Mexico I often want to hide when I walk by men, some are very...morbosos! And I'm not even trying to call their attention, they say things like "Adios mamasita" which I hate and find very offensive.
    On the other hand I do appreciate when they give nice piropos, but usually they are not without morbo, like "que muchacha mas bonita" is okay, but some it also depends on the tone they use to say it, like some say it in a nasty way, like they just want to undress you.

    When I lived in Mexico, being very tall (for a Mexican woman) I used to get "grandotas aunque me peguen" I would often answer "Ven aca a ver si de verdad te gusta que te pegue!" but then I just learned to ignore them and just roll my eyes.
    =/

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  3. You look great with booties! And I love your braid, you have to teach us how, I cannot braid my hair like the one you did!

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  4. I find that some men in general no matter what their nationality they come from make those comments. Sorry you had to deal with such childish banter. Hold your head high girl because those men who make those kind of comments aren't worth your time of day. And I went to a private grade school and the boys would try to feel on the girls who developed quicker then others, simply horrible. I detest when someone makes a comment only about my body because it's degrading.

    Your outfit is so chic and I like you thought wear ankle boots with a dress just would look right on me but they look awesome. I learned how to do a fishtail braid by watching Traycee on Youtube, it's takes time but a very attractive style.

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  5. so sleek and pretty. perfect dress and shoes, love it.

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  6. I love the brown booties you picked up so much I headed over to Aldo's site to see what they have now. I have been on the hunt for a pair of laceup booties with a low heel and keep getting thwarted. Keep up the 30 for 30!

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  7. "piropos" are considered ok here in Brazil as well, although I don't think we have a name for it in Portuguese. maybe "cantada", but not really, because a "cantada" can also mean flirting. older people would say "gracejo", I think.

    anyway, I've always hated them! I'm so glad I got older, and at the same time developed a "don't mess with me!" face, because it made them stop altogheter.

    what drives me crazy is that it is somehow encouraged in my culture, even by other women! there are many who say, "oh, if construction workers don't hit on me when I'm on the street, I feel ugly". and I go all, "what the...?". I never could undestand that mentality. it is the kind of things my mom said I would understand as I grew older, but I never got it.

    anyway, you look such a cutie in this outfit, and I say that in a piropo-free way :)

    beijo!

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  8. Piropos can be offensive because of the WAY they are said.
    It's - or in my head it should a be compliment - that is said in a rather witty way.
    Going by construction sites is the worst -
    The worst piropo I have ever heard of was said to an aunt who was in the fish market and they guy looks at her and says " I pee for you " - no further comment !

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  9. I love the brown booties you picked up so much I headed over to Aldo's site to see what they have now. I have been on the hunt for a pair of laceup booties with a low heel and keep getting thwarted. Keep up the 30 for 30!

    ReplyDelete

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